So what is it about farts that are so funny? It's a completely normal body function but it makes me laugh. Call me immature, but flatulence is just good old fun. My wife would not agree with me on this topic as she has to live the deadly odor that somehow comes out of my body.
Her: What stinks, did you fart!
Me: No. (Said with a smirk)
Her: Yes you did, it smells like a turd wrapped in burnt hair!
Me: Man, that's a harsh analogy.
(Then I catch a whiff as they never seem to reach the nostrils of those who deal it until after others are already gagging)
Me: Wow, it smells like rotten eggs mixed with poo.
We seem to have these kind of conversations at least on a daily basis. Anyway, what made me think to write this blog is because of a visit to the men's bathroom at location X.
Now for women's sake, I need to give a little background information, men hang with me. So a men's bathroom usually has a urinal right next to a toilet stall. Now, when men pee, we fart too. I'm sure there's some kind of scientific reason this happens, like because we're male, but I don't know for sure what it is. Also, on average, men fart about 26 times as much as our female counter parts.
Okay, back to the experience. So I was sitting on the throne, minding my own business in the stall right next to the urinal. Someone comes into bathroom and I can see the shoes and recognize them. As said patron proceeded to do his business the farts came. Now, when you hear them, it's just funny. A string of air biscuits came flying out wildly. Women might be able to compare this to attending a Yoga class where the attendants get a little too relaxed. It's just funny to hear other people tear ass and not have to smell it. If you do live with it, passing gas is no laughing matter. (If you do, please visit http://www.dontpassgas.org/downloads/DPG_Brochure.pdf)
Now, I offer up the chance for some good comments from readers. I wanted to get a list of other terms used for flatulence. I offer these up to get the brain going and see what other ones you come up with.
-Let one fly
-Crop dusting
-Back Draft
-Barking Spiders
.....
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2 comments:
Flatulent...cutting the cheese...what I want to know is why my newborn saves all of his up for release from 4am to 6am?
You better watch out. Obama will want to tax your flatulence. He'll call it a "flat-tax" so that even conservatives will get behind it. oooooh, that pun stinks!
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